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Exposure Therapy What is the worst thing you can think of happening? The absolute worst. An alien apocalypse stole your family, dog, and left you all alone on earth bad. Write it out. The most traumatizing case scenario and read it over and over and over. Read it out loud and make a voice note to replay in the car while driving or on a walk. Desensitize yourself to it. Put yourself in the moment. Make a plan of what you would do, how you would cope and how you would make yourself feel better. If it's not hard to write then you're not digging deep enough. I've cried out of fear writing one of these letters but after the 10th time reading and listening, the fear started to dissipate. If you can do the action or experience whatever you are scared of, do it! Ex: going on a plane, riding in a car, being in a social setting, going over a bridge, or whatever it is, do it as many times as you can. Experience the fear, accept the fear, and realize that you got through the day despite the fear. Appreciate every moment Becoming mindful takes work and practice. We become so absorbed in social media, instant gratification, and worrying about the future that we forget to take in what's happening right now. Sit and appreciate that you are not yet in the moment you might be fearing at this exact point in time. Even if things are hard right now and you're scared of them becoming worse, get comfort knowing that, right now, you have what's around you. 

Get out of your daily routine and go with the flow That mostly goes for people (like myself) who like to do things their way, usually alone, and with no one else's input. It is something that I have had to work on immensely. Let's say all of your friends want to get Mexican food and you're not the biggest fan of Mexican food. Instead of trying to either get them to eat somewhere else, control the situation, or avoid the night completely, just go. Order rice, try something new, and do not miss the opportunities that could be provided because it was not what you originally wanted to do!  Let it happen. Let life happen. You could find joy or humor in unexpected moments. What will I loose? Letting anxiety run your life and control your actions can be detrimental for a lot of people. Some avoid their fears at all costs because of the possibility of them becoming reality. You don't want the possibility of heartbreak? Guess you could end up alone and never make another human connection again. Scared of being alone? Settling for someone you think is safe is a cute idea. Terrified of failing at your dream job, with that promotion, or your dream business venture? Fun plan staying stagnant in your life, career, and not reaching your full potential. What I want you to do is notice what your anxieties are causing you to miss out on. What do you gain from letting them be involved in your life? Get angry about it. That's no way to live.

What if I want to give up?

Last week I was not doing well. I woke up and I felt unmotivated, not like myself, and extremely sad. There was an external factor and news I found out that attributed to that but a lot of it was also internalized. This time of year I tend to get flashbacks and triggers due to the water and atmosphere. Tends to happen when you go through something major during a prominent season. I had 2-3 days where I genuinely was having a hard time doing anything but escaping through TikTok. I tried so hard and every thing I tried to do I felt like more of a failure. Then everything I didn't do that I knew I SHOULD do made me feel even worse. This is what I did. The night after my 2 or 3rd bad day I wrote 6 things I wanted to do in the morning and started hyping myself up for them. They were things I knew I could do and wanted to do for myself. They were simple and even though I didn't want to do half of them I knew it would benefit me greatly.  Let me tell you how they went.

Do You... You want to eat healthy? Practice Balance? Put yourself first so you can be your best for others? Start working out? Practice self care? Start meditating? I know there can be so many things you want to start doing to enhance your life. Dreams you want to focus on but looking at the big picture or getting too bogged down with the smaller details can become overwhelming. Focus on ONE habit, routine, or challenge at a time to start forming/getting rid of.

Fuel your body: I mean mentally and physically. 80% whole foods that are fueling and 20% whatever the f*ck you want - maybe something sweet or salty! EAT ENOUGH. The more you starve yourself the more you are likely to binge and actually gain the weight (mental and physical) you're trying to lose. Stop Insulting Yourself: Out loud or in your head. I want you to accept every single compliment that comes your way without question. Sleep Naked: Think about this. We probably spend 99.9% of our day clothed. We see our body naked when we shower and even then sometimes you can look away. Therefore HOW are you supposed to be comfortable with it and okay when you see it? Sleeping naked ups your % drastically. It's uncomfortable the first few nights but then you'll probably never go back!

You’re probably mentally burnt out thinking about “all the things you have to do and start again”. 1. Do you have a watch that tracks your steps? Sometimes it makes you realize how much or how little you were moving and can sometimes give you that extra push to get up and go for a walk. 2. Every workout that you do does not have to be an hour it could just be 10-20 minutes! Lower the weights, make it 2 rounds instead of 3-4. What's most important is that you DID it! 3. The biggest thing is realizing how far you’ve come and that that does not go away overnight. 4. Motivation does fade which is why habits are so important. I recommend reading How to Build a Habit in the DFit Blog archive. It's about going to the gym/Setting up your home workout space on the days you said you would to just said that habit and just do something! Even if all you do is walk in the doors and walk out give yourself credit for continuing that habit!

I'm so glad you asked! Sometimes when you're on a roll you get scared you are going to lose your momentum and I'm here to tell you how you can keep it. 1. Keep doing what you're doing but make sure you do not burn yourself out. I'm so excited that you're excited but running fast at the beginning of the marathon does not guarantee first or that you can even finish. It's about pacing yourself and knowing when to take a day (or three) off. 2. Make it balanced. If you're following my meal plan go off of it once a week - utilize you're dining out feature. If you're just workout/stretching then make sure you do not cut out your favorite foods cold turkey. Eat what makes you FEEL your best mentally and physically. 3. Habits. It takes 21 days to build a habit and habit trumps motivation almost every single time. Why? Because you know how good you feel if you do it vs when you don't.